Dieselpunk + Steampunk Culture

Hello fellow diesel lovers!

I created a 30 second CG Visual effects Dieslpunk trailer for my university honours project.
I would love to hear your feedback, I am quite new to Dieselpunk so any opinions on how I met this amazing genre would be very much appreciated! Thankyou very much! :)


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Scene 1 with the city and the bridge

  • Good modeling and layering.
  • I'm a little confused as to where the super-highway is headed. Because of the opacity of the smog, it looks like it ends at the waterline instead of continuing into the background.

Scene 2 with the plane

  • The plane could use additional fine-grain texture. It already appears to have aging, but the matte surfaces look to be made of smooth plastic instead of metal.
  • The animation path of the plane appears to be dragging instead of flying. It lacks a sense of weight. Instead of a linear motion, consider using an EaseIn curve. Also, consider adding some jitter to the plane and some additional cloud effects in the foreground to give more of a parallax effect to the motion.

Scene 3 with the plane

  • Good storm effect and nice sync with the thunder audio.
  • The motion of the propeller is well done.

Scene 4 with the city

  • Strange choice for a cut, but you're showing a good model.

Scene 5 with the plane

  • Okay jumpcut.

Scene 6 with the bridge

  • Good POV

Scene 7 titlecard

  • The font choice is a little unusual because it's so modern. Consider an older typeface.
  • FWIW, I always hated that particular quote. To me, it's like saying, "Oranges are oranger than apples!"
  • Nice electrical effects, but take note that the color key for the titlecard clouds seems to be different than the cloud colors you're using in the primary scenes.

Scene 8 with the plane and the city

  • Much better sense of weight with the plane this time.

Scene 9 with the bridge

  • Due to the cloud effects, it's initially hard to pick up on the plane moving in the background.

Scene 10 titlecard

  • Well animated.

Scene 11 with the plane and the city

  • The linear motion of the plane is apparent in this scene again. Consider following the planes motion with the camera while slowly zooming in. It will limit the viewer's background reference. With a little bit of jitter on the plane to simulate turbulence and propeller chop, it could polish up nicely.

Scene 12 credits

  • In the ratings box, consider changing the letter from "E" to "A." "E" typically stands for "Everyone," but you're shooting for "Awesome."

Overall, the piece is pretty cool and nails down a lot of the aesthetics that we shoot for. Well done, Donald!

Hey, donald, I'm happy tome gave you all this super advice. 

To me the video was just amazing ;-)

Thank you for the amazing response Tome!

I'm going to have go through your post in detail and study each aspect! Your feedback is very insightful and will be brilliant for my evaluation stage. Thank you so very much! :)

Tome Wilson said:

Scene 1 with the city ...... 

......a lot of the aesthetics that we shoot for. Well done, Donald!

Thank you JazzFeathers! :)

JazzFeathers said:

Hey, donald,......

......amazing ;-)

No problem.  I hope it helps with your project!  Good luck!

Thrilling!  Absolutely top notch work!

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